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The Teddy Bear

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The Teddy Bear                                                                                                                 June 16, 2020

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Very slowly, almost fearfully, I opened the door. Jerry was right behind me. We knew we were alone in the house, yet we were as quiet as a butterfly softly landing on a flower. I looked around the bedroom, making sure that both Mom and Dad were not going to surprise us by secretly returning from the church next to the parsonage. I could smell her perfume she had applied before she left. But it was just a lingering odor. They were at the choir practice and the prayer meeting. Assured we would not be discovered, I looked at the five drawer brown chest with gold trim. There on the top, toward the back, was our goal for the evening. 

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“Do you see it?” I quietly inquired of Jerry.

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“Uh huh.” he almost whispered

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We paused and looked. There it was. The Teddy Bear.

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Cautiously, we moved by the bed with the home made quilt. Unconsciously I counted the seven steps to the prize. We stopped with the item just beyond our reach. Standing on tiptoes, I could see the head of the bear with its one button eye looking toward the door behind us as if he expected to be rescued at any moment by his legal master. Maybe, just maybe, I could reach his leg and pull him over to me.

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Still on my toes and stretching to the best of my length, I moved my hand across the top of the high furniture. I felt the crocheted dolly and tried to stretch some more. Moving my hand to the side, I hit the little ceramic dish where Pop dropped extra coins from his pockets. The blue dish slid sideways and then over the curved edge at the front. I grabbed for it but was too late. 

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With a loud crash, coins scampered every direction across the linoleum floor. 

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“Quick! Help me pick them up!” I commanded in a panic voice.

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The hardy dish had survived the fall and we began to refill it. 

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“Make sure we get every coin.” I cautioned. “We don’t want them to know we were in here.”

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After gathering all we saw and making an additional study of the floor, I handed Jerry the coin filled container.

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“Hold it for a minute.”

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I moved over to Mom’s dressing table with the big oval mirror. I picked up her bench and moved it in front of the imposing chest. I climbed up and looked back at Jerry.

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“Hand it to me.” I said.

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Carefully, so we would not have to round up wayward coins again, Jerry placed it in my hand. I turned to place it on top, guessing where it had been located so Pop would not be suspicious that someone had stolen some of his coins, or worse, a villain had handled his beloved bear.

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Reaching across, I gently lifted the bear and, with the care of handling a sacred object, transported it to Jerry. 

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As I climbed down, he held it out from his body like it might hurt him. 

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“Let me have it and let’s go to our room.” 

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We sat down on the floor and spent a few minutes looking at the brown bear with the upturned nose. We wondered why the other button for the eye had disappeared. We noticed a seam that was open for a short distance allowing some of the selser to stick out. The arms and the legs were intact and could make their 360 degree circle. It was in amazing good condition for a stuffed toy at least 25 years old. 

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We knew we were forbidden to play with it. When it made its appearance from some storage place, Pop had explicitly told us, “This is not a toy. It is not to be played with. It is mine and you can only look at it up here.”

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We didn’t understand why we couldn’t enjoy playing with it but we knew it was not allowed. The prohibition only made the desire worse so we had schemed to get it down and enjoy its company.

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“Look how the arms go all the way around.” I pointed out. “See how the legs move.”

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“Let me do it.” Jerry begged.

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“Be careful.” I cautioned. “We don’t want anything to happen to it.”

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He held it and slowly moved the arms and legs. He touched the black nose and gently turned the head. The black ribbon around the neck was tied into a big bow knot.

 

I took it from his hands and put his feet on the floor balancing him to stand by himself. 

 

“Hi, Jerry.” I talked for Teddy in a higher, small voice. “Do you like bears?”

 

“Yes. I like you.” he replied as if the bear had asked the question. “What’s your name?”

 

“I’m Teddy. Who are you?”

 

“I’m Jerry.”

 

“Hi, Jerry. I like you.” With that I moved his arm, reaching out for a hand shake. Jerry welcomed the handshake and with that the fun began. He walked. He talked. He waved. He did headstands.

 

We took turns holding him, moving him and enjoying Teddy’s company.

 

Suddenly, we heard voices as people were leaving the church. Quickly we rushed back to the bedroom. I jumped up on the stool, took the bear Jerry was offering me, and placed it as exactly as I could in its original position.

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I jumped down and moved the bench back to the dressing table. I flipped off the light as we headed out to our bedroom. 

 

Within minutes, Mom came into our room. 

 

“How are things?” she inquired.

 

“Okay.” I said, with a little squeak in my voice.

 

“Me, too.” Jerry chimed in.

 

With a look of suspicion, she left the room, aware that Jerry and I usually had a guilty sound and look when we had been left alone.

 

Nothing was said about the bear that evening as we got ready for bed. It was not mentioned the next morning as we prepared for school. We figured we had done okay when the subject was not brought up after school.

 

Saturday morning we awoke to the smell of bacon floating through the doorway. We headed into the kitchen with oatmeal and cinnamon toast adding to the pleasant aroma. We devoured all that was offered quickly, ready to find some new adventure.

 

“Come back to the table after you put your dishes into the sink.” Pop said in a normal voice.

 

We put our plates and glasses into the sink and returned to the table, expecting to hear about plans for the day.

 

As we sat back down, Pop put the teddy bear in the center of the red plaid oilcloth. My young heart skipped a beat. We had been found out. The bear, looking at us out of his one eye, convicted us as felons.
 

Pop didn’t say a word for what seemed like ages. Neither Jerry nor I looked at him or Teddy.  

 

When I couldn’t stand the silence any longer I had to say something. 

 

“How did you know?” I confessed unintentionally.

 

He opened his hand and took a piece of yellow selser and pushed it back into the seam.

 

“Let me tell you the story about this bear.

 

“When I was about your age,” he began, “we lived in Kennon (Kenton), Tennessee, famous for its Albino squirrels. We rented a little three room house. The rent wasn’t much but It was more than Pa, your grandfather, could afford. Often it was more than we had each month.

 

“That December Ma took sick. Our good doctor made a house call and gave her some medicine. He didn’t charge much but Pa had to hunt around the house to find something to cover the debt. Finding a little cash and a bag of eggs from our hens, he offered what he could to the generous doctor who accepted it as payment. Ma had to have more medication as she recovered slowly.

 

“Shortly before Christmas, Pa said, ‘Russell, you know I haven’t been able to do much work. With the rain and then snow, it has been too hard on the dray mules to pull the wagon. Plus, no one is moving and the stores haven’t needed me to haul merchandise. I’ve had to sell the team because I couldn’t buy hay for them. This means we won’t have much of a Christmas this year. There won’t be any presents for you or Vonna Lee. With her sickness, Ma has not been able to sew anything and our cash is all gone. We don’t even have enough for a big Christmas meal so we will just enjoy what we have.’

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“I was disappointed but accepted it. We didn’t even put up a tree until the day before Christmas. Pa and I went to a friend’s farm and asked him for a tree. I carried the ax and Pa chose a small tree that I could fell almost in one blow. 

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“We placed it in a bucket of sand and located it by the window. Vonna Lee and I strung some popcorn and wrapped it around the tree. We tore up some old paper and sprinkled it on the branches to perfect the final decoration.

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“The two of us sat there for a few minutes thinking about what a sad Christmas this would be. We were glad we still had Ma with us. Soon we were busy with chores and other activities but with a heavy heart.

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“It was late afternoon when a wagon stopped out front. In the West Tennessee way, the neighbor called out, ‘Christmas gift.’

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Vonna Lee and I threw open the door and the cold air rushed in as we rushed out. We stood beside Pa as he exchanged greetings with the visitors. 

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“It was the couple who lived two houses down from us. As he climbed down from the wagon and moved to the back, he said, ‘Some of us and the people at the church knew you were having a rough time and we gathered up a few things for you.’ With that he pulled a number 2 wash tub to the back of the wagon.

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“‘Want to give me a hand with this? It’s pretty heavy.’ he inquired.

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“Pa grabbed the handle on one side and the neighbor grabbed the other one. Together they carried it into our front room. It made a but thump as they sat it on the floor.

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“Ma had struggled out of bed and entered the room walking slowly on her crutch. Tears freely came down her face as she made her way to try to give hugs to the thoughtful neighbor and his wife. 

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“The wife produced a pitcher and said, ‘I brought some boiled custard.’

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“Ma said, ‘Vonna Lee, get some glasses.’ and together we shared that sweet drink.

 

“Ma could hardly speak as she tried her best to express her thanks to the thoughtful friends. They just shrugged off. ‘It’s what Christians do.’

 

“Pa never was very emotional but just stood there softly saying, ‘Much obliged.’ as they climbed back into the wagon and called, ‘Merry Christmas!’

 

“Vonna Lee and I didn’t notice the neighbors leaving. We were too interested in the wash tub that seemed to fill our small room with the tree. We began to empty it onto the wood floor.

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“There were jars of canned tomatoes, peaches, beets, pickles and other handiwork from gardens. There were bags of potatoes and beans as well as some flour and sugar. Someone had put in a smoked ham that smelled great. A large slab of bacon added to the mouth watering aroma.

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“About half way down, there was a rag doll for Vonna Lee. With a squeal of delight she grabbed it, hugged it to her chest and ran over to sit down next to the Christmas tree.

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“I continued, holding up every item up for Ma’s joy before I sat it onto the floor. Almost at the bottom I saw the teddy bear. I knew it was mine. I pushed stuff off of it and pulled it out into my arms. I looked it over. It was not new. It was someone’s left over. It had been played with by someone who loved it. But now it was mine. Now it was my Christmas gift. I held it tight. I didn’t want to let go. I didn’t empty any more of the wash tub. I didn’t care about what was the meal for tomorrow. For now I had the most wonderful Christmas possible. 

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“I looked at him and said, ‘You’re Teddy. You’re my Teddy.’

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“That night, Teddy slept in my bed, Christmas day, I carried him around as I did my chores. I held him close as I helped Ma put all the food into the pantry. I placed him in my lap as we had our festive Christmas dinner of more food than we had thought possible. 

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“He became my constant companion. I played with him every spare moment. I said goodbye to him as I left for school and greeted him when I returned. I shared what was happening in my life. I was even careful to not get him dirty or damaged. 

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“As boys do, I grew up. Boys don’t have stuffed animals. I had chores and work. Teddy sat and watched me grow up. I would occasionally pick him up and enjoy the amazing feeling of God providing the unexpected. I would reminisce about the compassion of neighbors and church members. Teddy was no longer a toy. He was more than a friend. He was the heart of what it meant to be loved.

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“When your mom and I got married, I didn’t have much to take into our new home but Teddy went with us.

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“Somewhere along the way he lost an eye and a little bit of his stuffing. But that didn’t matter because of who he was and I loved him.”

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I think there was a tear glistening in Pop’s eyes as he finished, “So you see, boys, why I don’t want you to play with him. I want you to love him and see in him the joy that comes as God provides.” 

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We didn’t play with Teddy but, as we looked at him in his place of honor on the chest, we had the happiness which comes from sharing a great event with our father.

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1 Timothy 6:17

“Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment.”

 

P.S. Many years later as Mom and Pop were moving into assisted living, God provided an extra blessing when a wonderful lady purchased Teddy for $100, a continuing blessing into old age.

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